Sunday, September 13, 2015

Aching Vulnerability: A Poem about Anxiety and Depression

Aching Vulnerability: A Poem about Anxiety and Depression

It always starts out with just a lingering thought in the back of my mind:
"You can't do it"
"You're not strong enough"
"Why are you even trying?"

I don't believe them in the beginning
but slowly
ever so slowly
I'm convinced that those thoughts are true

I start feeling weaker
things become harder
the ache in my throat larger
I want to cry
to give in

Because I start believing it'll be easier
to just stop trying
to stop fighting
all the emotions trying to take over
my vulnerable mind

And sometimes I do give in
even if it's just for a minute
laying in bed with covers over my head
crying into my pillow
willing for it all to just go away and stop

But then I remind myself that all those thoughts
aren't really true.
I've done this before
and I'll do it again.

I will get up
and I will keep on being strong
even if it is harder
even if I do have to take things
One moment at a time. 

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